Marriage
Nikah — half the deen, and a sign of Allah
Nikah — the sunnah of building a home
"Marriage is my sunnah. Whoever turns away from my sunnah is not of me." — Sahih al-Bukhari 5063
What makes a nikah valid
- ◆Choose for faithThe Prophet ﷺ said a woman is married for four things — wealth, lineage, beauty and religion — "so choose the one of religion, and may your hands be rubbed with dust." Righteousness is the ground a home is built on, for both spouses. (Sahih al-Bukhari 5090)
- ◆A wali (guardian)The bride is given in marriage by her wali — her father or nearest male guardian. "There is no marriage except with a wali." He acts in her interest and with her consent, never against her will. (Jamiʻ at-Tirmidhi 1101)
- ◆Two witnesses & the offerThe marriage is contracted openly with two witnesses, through a clear offer (ijab) and acceptance (qabul) — "I give her to you in marriage" answered by "I accept." It is announced, not hidden.
- ◆The mahr (bridal gift)The groom gives the bride a mahr as her own right: "And give the women their bridal gifts graciously." It may be modest — the Prophet ﷺ approved a mahr as small as an iron ring — but it is hers alone, never the family's. (Qur'an 4:4)
- ◆The walima (feast)After the marriage the groom holds a walima to announce and celebrate it. The Prophet ﷺ told Abdur-Rahman ibn ʻAwf: "Give a wedding feast, even with one sheep." Keep it within your means and free of extravagance. (Sahih al-Bukhari 5167)
Rights — love and mercy, what each owes the other
"And of His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may find tranquillity in them — and He placed between you affection and mercy." — Qur'an · Ar-Rum 30:21
- ◆Live together in kindnessAllah commands the believers: "And live with them in kindness." Marriage is a partnership of gentleness, patience and good company — overlooking faults and meeting them with the best of character. (Qur'an 4:19)
- ◆The husband's dutiesHe provides for and protects his wife within his means, treats her with kindness and does not harm her. "The best of you is the best to his wife, and I am the best of you to my wives." Leadership in a home is service, not domination.
- ◆The wife's rights & roleShe has the right to her mahr, to maintenance, to be treated well and consulted. She keeps his home and honour, and her own wealth stays entirely hers. Each is a garment for the other (2:187) — covering, comforting and completing. (Qur'an 2:187)
- ◆Raising the next generationTogether they raise children upon faith and good character — the lasting fruit of the marriage, and a sadaqah jariyah whose reward continues after them.
When you marry
اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَسْأَلُكَ خَيْرَهَا وَخَيْرَ مَا جَبَلْتَهَا عَلَيْهِ، وَأَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ شَرِّهَا وَشَرِّ مَا جَبَلْتَهَا عَلَيْهِ
Allahumma inni as'aluka khayraha wa khayra ma jabaltaha ʻalayh, wa aʻudhu bika min sharriha wa sharri ma jabaltaha ʻalayh.
"O Allah, I ask You for the good in her and the good of the nature You gave her, and I seek refuge in You from her evil and the evil of the nature You gave her." Say it, placing your hand gently on the crown of her head. (Sunan Abi Dawud 2160)
Before intimacy
بِسْمِ اللَّهِ، اللَّهُمَّ جَنِّبْنَا الشَّيْطَانَ وَجَنِّبِ الشَّيْطَانَ مَا رَزَقْتَنَا
Bismillah, Allahumma jannibnash-shaytana wa jannibish-shaytana ma razaqtana.
"In the name of Allah. O Allah, keep Satan away from us and keep Satan away from what You grant us." Whoever says it, if a child is decreed, Satan will never harm it. (Sahih al-Bukhari 141)
For a home of comfort
رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا
Rabbana hab lana min azwajina wa dhurriyyatina qurrata aʻyunin wajʻalna lil-muttaqina imama.
"Our Lord, grant us from our spouses and offspring comfort to our eyes, and make us a model for the righteous." (Qur'an · Al-Furqan 25:74)